Salkan Soiree Ep7: And Now, For Something Completely Different

 Run Date: August 1, 2023

PCs

Baldor: Lv2 Barbarian
Conner: Lv3 Fighter
Henry: Lv2 Wonderworker

Hench

Walter: Lv2 Fighter
Tachaka: Lv3 Barbarian

And Now, For Something Completely Different

We were down a few players this week, but the game must go on! We went over the process of calculating monthly expenses and how it had ripple effects on how the greater world would treat them, and the players worked out a plan of action. Henry took advantage of increased spending to bump his station up enough to interview Tachaka, and hired him on. The group then decided to search for a rumoured Shrine Of the Ape God in the northern mountains.

The first day was uneventful and the group arrived at the Sapphire Road, the local river, at nightfall. They decided to sleep on the side of civilization and set their camp and watches. Baldor was up first. The humidity and chill coming from the river bothered him so he was on edge. He ended up stoking the fire to keep the ambient humidity from snuffing it out. At this point, he spotted shadows rushing the camp. A group of Grave Ghouls rushed the sleeping bodies of Baldor's allies, and I made a grave mistake. A sleeping character is Helpless, and arguably should have been instantly killed by the ghouls mauling them. I forgot this. In hindsight, I think the resulting battle was more sportsmanlike than "ya'll are dead, kthx."

Baldor, being the only one on high alert, had his axe at the ready when several of the ghouls fell upon him. He was brutal, cleaving through two of the three that had mauled him. His resilient body forced off the numbness that threatened to take him down. Meanwhile, the party woke up and began lashing out in desperation. Tachaka managed to find his weapon and begin his own assault, and with Baldor, circled the camp to defend the others. Henry lost a spell to changing battle conditions, and Conner joined the slowly regrouping party. Walter, alas, was paralyzed. The fight continued for another few moments before everything went silent and the party took stock of the damage.

Henry used his divine power to cure Walter's paralysis, and Baldor nearly started a fight by taunting him for being lazy. After Henry mediated the tense situation, he risked Overcasting to try and get the party into a reasonable shape. He also tried to remember what was special about the touch of a grave ghoul, but his mind was too busy to recover that important piece of information.

After their harrowing night, the party hit up a local farmer and paid to stay in his barn and rest for the day. The next morning, they crossed the Sapphire Road and began their trek into the mountains. Their lack of experience showed, however, as they immediately got lost. As they wandered the winding paths and jagged rock, they stumbled onto a pair of mounted goblin guards. The signs were clear to GTFO, so the party threw up their hands and headed back. Their stumbling continued until they found the Sapphire Road again, though further upstream than previous. After a quick break and a decision to return to their search for the Shrine of the Ape God, the party ventured again into the mountains.

It was nightfall before the group discovered anything of interest. They saw strange coloured lights streaming from a cave and felt the primal resonance of a constant beat. Baldor, being the ever brave and possibly stupid, snuck up to the entrance and peeked around the corner against the wishes of the party. What he spotted lead to a complete juxtaposition in tone so far: a large, well-dressed and buff zombie was standing in front of a felt line with his arms crossed. Behind him appeared to be a curtain of glass beads and the source of the music and glittering lights. Baldor returned to inform the group of what he saw. They were now more adamant to avoid it.

Baldor, however, returned and tried to speak with the zombie by himself. It held out an open palm and Baldor paid a gold coin. The bouncer swallowed it and opened the felt line for him to enter. Baldor quickly found himself in a grotesque nightclub with animated arms mounted to the ceiling, twirling a ball of glass that was reflecting a continual light. On a stage, surrounded by undead groupies, was a Khana man dressed in a white striped suit, hat, and black shoes. He was dancing to the delight of his fans, sliding across the stage in the style of Michael Jackson. After finishing his number, he spotted Baldor and came down to meet him.

What followed was a mix of the players being in absolute shock and paranoia setting in. Conner's player said, "This is giving me Hotel California vibes," while Henry and the others avoided the drinks and snacks that Mr Jackie, the owner of the establishment, comped. Baldor, however, was ever friendly and tried the charred peanuts and special "hand-crafted" ale. Turns out, they weren't half bad when taken together.

Baldor continued his chat with Mr Jackie, learning that the nightclub was his pride and joy; "Imagine it, a party that never ends!" He explained how his particular eccentricities were disliked by the more traditional Khana in their stuffy towers, and how those old men couldn't see the future of entertainment. After Henry asked why he was set up in the mountains instead of a city, Mr Jackie gave the expected response of the common people lacking proper vision. Soon enough, however, he wanted to branch out and build a proper haven for those with the heart and soul of the party.

Once the conversation was over, the group asked if he had any rooms. Mr Jackie was happy to comp them a VIP room, and continued to encourage the group to let loose and dance for a while; free themselves from the weights of mortal life, even for a night. The group declined the offer and retired to their room for the night. The next morning, the beat was still rolling. The group got their things together and met up with Mr Jackie, who was moon-walking with backup dancers on the stage. He continued to encourage them to give the floor a try, and Baldor accepted. Baldor began dancing like a character from VTM:Bloodlines, but was shortly joined by several zombie groupies. The terrible dancer number ended with Baldor feeling pumped and the group departed.

Given the various troubles and the clock ticking away, the party decided to cut their losses and head back to town. On the way, they ran into a pair of giant boars they easily dispatched. Baldor hacked off the tusks for a prize, delaying the party's return by a night. It was at this point several members of the party were struck with nightmares. Their return to civilization also began to show their features becoming sickly; grey skin, sunken eyes, and dried lips. The unknown countdown continued as they returned to Fayum.

Rewards (Totals)

180 XP per PC

Afterword

We took a trip into the gonzo due to me joking about the randomized table results. I have to admit, despite the absolute juxtaposition and stupidity of the situation, it was quite freeing and I had a lot of fun. I often temper my wilder or stupid ideas, especially those that make a hard left in terms of world-building. Anyway, a note on the insta-kill thing: I still feel weird about it, but having slept on it I feel like the decision made was more sportsmanlike. I messed up the order of operations for encounters so it seems only fair that the party have a boon in return.